dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
