yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
