he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
