I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
