You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize