If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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