I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize