Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
