i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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