hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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