Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
