do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
