Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
should my penis look like a turkey
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize