Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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