if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
tell your sister to shave her snatch
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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