I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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