Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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