It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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