Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
