she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and youβre questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
Randomize