While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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