Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize