I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Randomize
