She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
