Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
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