my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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