I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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