if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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