Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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