In the future we'll all be gay
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
