I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
