I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Damn victory sex feels great
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
