The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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