At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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