you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
