she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
she peed on how many people?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
