he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
