Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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