ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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