awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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