Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
