My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
