i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
