One girl and one boy is just not enough.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
There's always time for handjobs
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
