In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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