I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
