Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
