She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
