The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize