Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
